alinewaites

This is a play that should be seen – not just by gay people, but by humankind….– a poem by a man who knows how the English language works and uses it to the fullest effect.”
Lovely, perceptive review by the great Aline Waites for “SEX/CRIME” at The Glory with Alexis Gregory, Jonny Woo and Mike Robertson. Closes this Saturday…
SEXCRIME
By Alexis Gregory
The Glory is a jaunty East End pub full of fairy lights and tinsel with a small stage backed by a slash cloth at one end – a place just waiting for a drag act to perform. This is a packed house, a crowd of people waiting, anticipating something that they know is going to be an event. Something different and just a tiny bit scary. We know it would be downstairs behind the narrow door, but the door is closed and guarded by the man in a multi-coloured kimono.
The event is due to start any minute, but apparently the actors are still rehearsing – practising – this is the last week of the run, surely they know it by now!. But the fact that we are being kept waiting adds to the mystique.
At last we are allowed down a long dark narrow staircase into a realm of blackness. The cellar is black, the ceiling is low and black. On a dais in front of us there is just a covered up sofa – the only sign of comfort in that bleak cellar.
Jonny Woo, an elegant businessman is in a suit – looking super- efficient, and well in charge of the proceedings. Another man, Alexis Gregory, smaller, bearded less self-confident frightened but eager for what is to happen.
First of all the paper work has to be taken care of. The younger man’s CV has to be explored. His booking confirmation is checked. Terms and conditions, Health and safety all must be looked into.
It became borne upon us that this is a murder scene, the bearded man is here to be killed and killed as brutally as possible. The two are planning to enact another recent killing – a vicious sex crime. Alex is hoping that afterwards he will be on Television just like the other victim.
Here is a fearsome scenario, described as a comedy. But although the funny lines come thick and fast – as thick and fast as the cruel ones, it is a beautifully written piece – a poem by a man who knows how the English language works and uses it to the fullest effect.
The play is described as a comedy. It’ s a comedy about violence. They are there to re create a brutal murder. The two men are determined to make this the best killing ever. The one who plays the master and the killer, is upper class and sophisticated, the other, lower in class is the victim. A neat echo of current politics.
The cleverest thing about this play is the total lack of violence. A stamp of the foot equals a blow to the head, but it is so frightening one can feel it. When the slaughter takes place, there is a blackout and we hear the screams in total darkness. We are forced to exercise our imaginations.
Robert Chevara is the director of this piece and as always he is able to create an experience for the audience that completely exposes our deepest feelings of fear – and he works brilliantly with the comic thrust of Alex’s script which makes us laugh at the same time.
It is a considered a queer play – and indeed it is homosexual sex we are talking about, but it would appeal just as much to anyone involved in human life. I confess I cannot totally understand everything, but I enjoyed experiencing it. This is a play that should be seen – not just by gay people, but by humankind.
Great lighting by Mike Robertson.

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TONIGHT AT EIGHT THIRTY
BY NOEL COWARD
AT THE JERMYN STREET THEATRE

Tom Littler, artistic director of the little Jermyn Street theatre has done an amazing job. He has directed nine short plays by Noel Coward with the same nine actors. These nine plays will be presented all day on Saturday and again on Sunday During the week they will be played three per evening. How delightful to get involved in the rarified air of Coward’s sophisticated world of the nineteen thirties..
Noel described the nine plays as ‘Brilliantly written, exquisitely directed and I am bewitching in all of them’. Of course, in the original, all the leading roles were played by the Master himself and his greatest muse Gertrude Lawrence. In Littler’s production they are ensemble pieces with each actor given one or two opportunities to shine.
The bunches of three are given names. “Bedroom Farces” consists of ‘We were dancing’ a daft couple who dance together and instantly fall in love as is the way in the Noel Coward Martini driven life style. Would be unfair to give the ending even though it is inevitable. ‘Ways and Means’ is a comedy about a young married couple who live on their wits and other peoples’ money on the Riviera. They are deep in debt and have to find some way of coping with financial disaster.
In the “Nuclear Families” section – ‘Family Album’ is a hilarious funeral with some rather good choral singing. ‘Hands Across the Sea’ is probably the funniest of all, some people have arrived at her dwelling and Lady Piggy, who invited them, cannot quite remember who they are. (My personal favourite – I understand her dilemma perfectly.) ‘The Astonished Heart’ was made into a film is about a married psychiatrist who falls in love with as temptress. This I felt was the least successful of all. Melodramatic with little sympathy for the characters involved. Coward could never quite believe in love.
The most well- known of the plays happens in “Secret Hearts”. ‘Red Peppers’ is probably the best known – I didn’t feel this was altogether successful – that the act was not really well worked out = but we must remember the amount of work these actors have to learn and remember. The final play in this set is ‘Still Life’ which was made into the film Brief Encounter. Another of the typical Coward lovers who never have much luck. But this is gentler than most and not quite so much alcohol involved.
It would be good to name all the actors, but it is an excellent ensemble and they are all in it together including the musical director. Needless to say they are all highly respected members of the profession.
It is a most fascinating way to spend Saturday or Sunday and I recommend seeing them all on one day if possible. Go back in time. Enter into Coward’s world. It is fun, though hardly realistic. And no worse for that.

Katherine Turner****
At the other Palace
Katherine Turner is a familiar face to everyone who ever goes to the movies. Here she is in person. A big personality, a Goddess in flowing black trousers and backed by brilliant musical director Mark Jasan at the grand piano plus base and guitar. A perfect combination. The lighting at the Other Palace is fantastic and she is shown in a most favourable light. She is a gal who is proud of being herself so she needs to feel relaxed in her situation.
She is a lady of extreme intelligence. She comes from an unusually varied background. Her father was a diplomat and she had moved all across the world before she started her formal education. She has a very strong personal and political conscience and the second half of her show shows this perfectly, beginning with ‘Buddy can you Spare a Dime’ a song from the twenties, which , sadly has become relevant today. She sings this to break your heart and she follows this with ‘You’ve got to be carefully taught’ from South Pacific. the Hammerstein plea for religious and colour tolerance.
She tells us she gets told to start at the top and begins with ‘Who knows where or When’ and follows this quickly with another piece of audience flattery ‘Let’s fall in love’
The first half is beautifully organised. Telling amusing theatrical stories in her deep famously gravelly voice and allowing them to lead into songs like ‘pick yourself up, start all over again’
Many people expect their cabaret stars to sing in a fashionable style. But her voice just doesn’t lend itself that way. Her voice resembles an old gravel pathway, but it is far more expressive than that of someone who just sings without making complete sense of the lyrics. She is a great actress, not a singer
She tells us of her terrible illness, Rheumatoid Arthritis and her years of being confined to a wheelchair. She thought this would be to the end of her life until she found a man who was working on a miracle cure, and though it took a lot of strength and stamina, she got herself cured and after a couple of years she managed to get over here to appear in The Graduate.
The theatre is her world and makes it obvious with songs like ‘Any place I hang my hat is home” and of course “Send in the Clowns.’ Here she exposes her heart and her brain to us. It doesn’t matter for a moment that her singing voice is a croak. In addition to being a Goddess, a politician and a trifle scary, she is vastly entertaining

TWANG
By Lionel Bart
at the Union Theatre

“Twang “ is one of the saddest stories in Theatrical musical history.
“Fings aint wot they used t’be” – Lionel Bart wrote at the height of his musical theatre fame.. He wrote single pop songs for Cliff Richard – “ Livin’ Doll “and Tommy Steel ”Handful of songs” Both of which appear in this latest re resurrection of Twang. The original cost an absolute fortune and lost all the money Bart had made on his fabulously successful show “Oliver”. He even was forced to sell the copyright on this so that he had no chance of making back any money from the enormously still popular and successful revivals.
“Twang” was the third of his latest trilogy which included “Maggie May” and “Blitz” both expensive shows that never paid their way. But “Twang” was a complete disaster, with script changes daily and infighting. It just never came together despite much help from friends. He just couldn’t get it together.
In this rewritten version, the jokes belong to 1950s kind of camp humour around the time when the world became aware of polare from Julian and Sandy, Kenneth Williams and HUGH Paddick on radio. Of course, these jokes now seem awfully stale and are only funny to certain large men in the audience who think anything camp is hilarious. It was also the time when the Carry On comedies were dwindling and concentrating too much on camp and sex jokes which soon got played out.
So the book is not witty or clever in any way and there is not a vestige of plot in Act One. However the piece is saved a little by the energy and enjoyment of the 16 strong cast. It is a romp for them and a lot of rough singing and frenetic choreography.
But the unforgiveable thing is that it is SO LONG! I thought act one was never going to end. Too many big production numbers that give the impression it’s the end, but they go on – and on.
Apart from that Poor old Robin Hood, my hero, who is dressed in a woolly cardigan like an old woman, (how could they do that?) In this play he is an abject coward having lost his ‘Twang’ and all the heroism is performed by Little John and Much the Miller’s son who is really the star of the show. Much turns up in the forest and can’t understand why everybody is singing and dancing. But he is a feisty little soul and helps Robin keep his reputation.
I enjoyed the singing of Alan A Dale – he sings Living Doll – eventually with a nice clear voice and with his guitar and Marian – the soprano got a nice song to sing
There were no mikes thank goodness, but the cast obviously missed them and used bits of wood to sing into instead.
All I can say is “Twang is, sadly, exactly wot it used t’be”

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CREAM TEA AND INCEST
BY BENJAMIN ALBOROUGH
AT THE HOPE THEATRE
Benjamin Alborough has written a really funny play. Something that you can come out feeling happy, feeling you’ve have a jolly good laugh. The author is a young man obviously obsessed by the Art of comedy and very very good at it. Writing and performing.
He and his director both realise the importance of music to get an audience into the right state of mind. The atmosphere is set up with terrific jazz as we enter the theatre and as we leave we have ragtime (Everybody’s doin’ it)
What is so astonishing about this play is that it very closely resembles the kind of comedy he is far too young to remember, but he has obviously studied The Goons. He and his director Benedict Philipp have a clear mental connection and they have collected some really talented actors – just three plus Alborough himself – who can exactly reproduce the ridiculous characters. The setting is early twentieth century and the author plays Eddie Spangler – a kind of Bertie Wooster in blazer and shorts, with Eoin McAndrew as the very perfect and loving butler who knows the answer to everything A kind of Jeeves taking a step further in his love of his master.
Aiden Change is Lord Wiggins a wild over camp guy who is love sick over Emily Rose – an off stage maiden. And Edward Spence is Lord Biggins who is the most evil villain ever to tread the boards. In addition to their named roles the actors play several others. There is a fun reference to Burt Kwouk when Aiden Cheng plays a Haltemprice policeman. He is also described in the script as blonde and blue eyes when he is so obviously Chinese.
But clever as the cast are, nothing could have happened if it had not been for the two Bens putting so much work and crazy ideas in to the production. Adding to the general idiocy is the set of props, beautifully designed in cardboard by Ivo de Jaeger who is also responsible for the pictures on the wall and on the programme. We must also mention the choreographer Hector Mitchell Turner and the original music by Olivia Rose Deane.
This is an excellent antidote to the serious problems of the day. So great to hear great guffaws of laughter from the audience.
CREAM

HAROLD AND MAUD
By Colin Higgins
At the Charing Cross Theatre

It must have been a difficult decision for Thom Southerland, director of this 1970s comedy to find a suitable replacement for the marvellous Sheila Hancock. But, it was a stroke of genius to decide on Linda Marlowe. She is the very essence of the aging hippie whose existential philosophies were such a part of the seventies flower-power culture. One totally believes in this character with her disregard for anything except immediate problems. She needs to go on a journey? She just jumps into anybody’s car and drives off. She pities a seal in the zoo, swimming in dirty water. She kidnaps him, puts him in her bathtub until she gets the opportunity to return him to the sea.
Another casting triumph is the part of Harold which is now being played by Patrick Walshe McBride. Dwarfing the tiny, colourful Maude, he is very tall and good looking with a wonderful deadpan delivery until he falls under Maude’s spell and reveals a sweet mischievous smile.
The actor-musicians are a constant in the play. Many of the instruments are on Francis O’Connor’s attractive and adaptable set throughout along with props to be used later. This talented cast play many of the characters and also as in a cinema, they play their instruments to set the beginning of each scene and comment on the one that has just ended.
Harold is a strange young man obsessed by suicide and funerals much to the annoyance of his socialite Mama, Mrs Chasen – a flawless performance by the wonderful Rebecca Caine. She carries much of the comedy during the first part of the play and it is up to her and the musicians to set the tone of the production. Here is a wealthy American family thrown into a states of absolute confusion by the son’s abortive efforts to commit suicide. Mrs Chasen takes these startling events with a slight amount of annoyance but without much in the way of panic unlike the new maid Marie (Anne White) who is terrified when she finds the boy hanging by the neck in the middle of the drawing room and is sent into a tap dancing frenzy.
The show is full of tiny pieces of joy, many that I don’t remember from the first time I saw the play. Some of the fun comes from Harold and the way he deals with the crazy young women presented to him as prospective wives. Mrs Chasen has procured them from a Datings Agency and all are played by the lovely Joanna Hickman.
I enjoyed the play better this time. I found it funnier and less sentimental than the first time round. I still cannot quite comes to terms with the ending – but this is the fault of the writer and the moral attitudes of the time it was written.

Liza Pulman
Liza sings Streisand ****
at the Crazy Coqs

Liza is a member of the illustrious and hugely talented Pulman family. An ex opera singer with a perfectly placed soprano voice with an extensive range – and a mischievous sense of humour
In her a tribute to Barbra Streisand she begins by telling us not to ‘Rain on Her Parade’ from ‘Funny Girl’ the show that made Barbra famous.
In her opening chat Liza tells us when, as a blossoming opera singer she went into a music shop to buy Wagner and came out with Streisand. A lesson well learnt.
Is this an impersonation or a fanzone? Not either. Liza Loves Barbra, but as her own person, on her own terms, with her own arrangements. She has a wonderfully thrilling voice and she is backed by her band, a brilliant double bass, drums, guitar, sax and trumpet = plus her wonderful musical director and arranger Joseph Atkins.
The songs of Streisand take us back with to so many memories. Her husband Eliot Gould, who was appearing in South Pacific at Drury Lane said in Gerry’s “My wife is going to be the biggest star of all’ This may be apocryphal (he didn’t say it to me}, but whether true or not, he was right.
The songs Liza choses from Barbra’s repertoire were eclectic. Lovely to hear ‘Second Hand Rose’, ‘Miss Marmelstein’, ‘You made the pants too long’ ‘On a clear Day’ ‘New York State of Mind’. Just too many to recall. She ends her first half with a bravura performance of ‘My man’ from Funny Girl before she goes off to change her frock!
Funny anecdote Barbra nearly didn’t get the part of Fanny Brice, because, though both Jewish, Brice had her nose reshaped and Streisand refused to do so – she no longer looked like Fanny Brice. But she got the role and the rest is history.
Liza’s finale is the song to break hearts in 2018. The song that Streisand sang to every President but the present one ‘Happy Days Are Here again’
Her encore is of course ‘People’ the song that just yells at us Barbra Streisand every time it is heard.
It is always a delight to visit the exquisite Crazy Coqs. This is a short run but ‘Liza sings Streisand’ is to be seen a many prestigious venues throughout the year.

THE MIKADO ****
By Gilbert and Sullivan
At the Kings Head Theatre
Probably the best known of all the Savoy operas, and of course, as performed by the Charles Court Opera Company, it is seen at it very best.
The comedy is sublime. This is one of the few occasions that John Savournin is not taking part, but he has directed this show perfectly for the open plan thrust stage and it works a dream. I am particularly taken by the divine heartless comedy. Koko is played by Philip Lee, a comic actor and singer worthy of his hire as he enters into the crazy world and witty wordplay of Gilbert. It took me a long time to figure out how he found his curious style London accent and eventually came up with Michael Crawford in some Mothers do Ave ‘em. I wonder if I got it right.
Nanki-Poo is played by Jack Roberts ..a fresh faced young man with an exceptional tenor voice and he handles the tremendously complicated ‘Wandering Minstrel’ song as easily as if it was ‘Sing a song of sixpence’. Matthew Kellett looking like an elegant moustached cad is exceptionally impressive as Pooh-Bah in one of the great GS comedy parts.
The whole thing takes place at the British consulate in Japan Pish-Tush, Poo-Bah and KoKo sing ‘If you want to know who we are. We are gentlemen IN Japan’ and it is in modern dress. The men look handsome in their diplomat style suits and I love the little girls in their gym slips but not so keen on their wedding gear in Act two – they are pretty, but would have liked a little more glamour. Alys Roberts is a delightful heroine Yum Yum, Jessica Temple and Corinne Cowling are lovely as Pitti-Sing and Peep-Bo. The Mikado himself {Matthew Palmer) is dressed as a General and Matthew Sivetere is his daughter in law elect – Katisha in exotic female dress.
It goes without saying that the singing as in all Charles Court productions is simply superb Every one of those actors can sing up a storm and play the fool just as easily.
The final glory of course is the love scene between Katisha and Ko-ko which runs between heavy drama, cuteness, slapstick and witty dialogue all in the space of a few minutes. {I am always moved by the story of the Tom Tit which illustrates my personal idiocy.}
A terrific crowd pleasing production. Pure comedy and song with some satirical/topical items which fit in perfectly.

Philip Ridley’s blisteringly honest play is here directed by the most appropriately vital director in the business. Robert Chevara and Philip Ridley are a match made in heaven or hell. Add to this the charismatic actress Louise Jameson and the talented young actor Thomas Mahey and Nicolai Hart Hansen’s designer eyes and the effect is breath-taking.
Robert Chevara has so much insight to the characters he shows us and he is lucky to be able to use the dramatic abilities of Ms Jameson who matches his honesty with hers and the chemistry between her and Mahy with such absolute professionalism.
Anita is the mother of a murdered boy a victim of homophobic hate crime. She has been forced to leave her neighbourhood because of the scorn of her neighbours – it is pointed out to us that mothers of homosexuals and come in for scorn and disapproval from uncaring and unknowing people. She tries desperately hard to stay cool, but we can tell there is probably an explosion below the surface.
She has arrived at her new flat and is visited by a young man who has been stalking her for eighteen weeks, ever since the young man was killed. He is Davey, the boy who found the body of her son.
They talk of Vincent, Anita reveals a certain amount of information – she says she had no idea her son was gay until the press wrote the murder story. But she tells us about a good looking, kind and intelligent young man.
Eventually Davy admits that the girl he has promised to marry was just to please his dying mother who he has nursed during her last illness.
The two gradually get to know each other through their relationship with Vincent. There are many points of powerful high drama that never falls into melodrama but always stays completely true, so many moments of black humour and actually funny scenes when Anita shares a joint for the first time and cannot stop laughing. She has been swigging straight gin from the bottle she was keeping under the sink and, after demurring weakly Davy has to join in
Humour is never far away, nor is tragedy. Both explode in anger frequently – anger, laughter and tears
As an admirer of the work of Philip Ridley one is constantly amazed at his expertise in creating dialogue that is real and rue and never stops being entertaining. He will take a favourite subject that has been told many times and finds a brand new way to tell it. This play gives two actors the chance to do a bit of real acting with no holds barred. This did not receive a standing ovation – we were still so gobsmacked we were anchored to our seats.

OLD FOOLS ****
BY TRISTAN BERNAYS
AT THE SOUTHWARK PLAYHOUSE

Tristan Bernays adventure into the lives of a married couple makes an extraordinary play. Much has been written about Alzheimer’s Disease, but this is the one that brings the message home so completely and in a seemingly effortless manner. Like many people’s lives, those of Tom and Viv are surprisingly funny and almost unbearably tragic. Asked how he wanted audiences to describe his play he said heart-warming and heart-breaking.
The play is written without a conventional time frame. A spoken word can send the minds of the characters into a completely different time and place – life for
Tom and Viv is a series of snapshots.
We are allowed into the heads of the two characters and we see them live through the changes in their relationships and their relationships with their parents and children. All portrayed by the same two actors.
In order for this to work, one needs a couple of outstanding players and here they have them Mark Arends and Frances Grey work together as if they are reading each other’s thoughts and give the audience the impression that they are also thinking and feeling just like the characters in the play. We get to know Tom as he was a cheeky young man, who picks up Viv by telling her she fancies him. We see them as young courting couple m as a married couple with conflicting professional problems and separations and near break-downs of their marriage.
I t has been directed carefully and with imagination by Sharon Burrell who has light handed way of dealing with this most tragic subject. The song that haunts them throughout their life cycle is the song that was playing when they first met. ‘The Way you look tonight’ A memory song, that cuts through the awfulness of memory loss.
My father had an early stroke and lost his ability to speak at all, so his means of communication were in song –as a musician he had a load of songs at his disposal. He could always find one to express what he was feeling even though he could not persuade his larynx to let him speak without music.
The actors play the whole thing on a bare stage with just one stool.
It is an extraordinary experience for an audience allowed into the hearts, minds and worlds of people under the threat of a dreadful disease.
The production is an official supporter of Alzheimer’s Research.